Dad’s persistence shines light on cyber-bullying

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Naperville Detective Rich Wistocki works to bring those dealing with child porn to justice. | Brian Powers~Sun-Times Media

Updated: August 6, 2011 12:20AM

Never underestimate the persistence of a father, especially one defending his kid from cyber-bullies.

When his 15-year-old son became a victim recently, this Aurora businessman took the matter directly to school district officials — and the cops.

The cyber crimes division of the police department in Naperville, where the father lives, confirmed an investigation is ongoing over the incident that started on a sports team at Naperville North. But the school, says Peter, who asked that his last name not be used to protect his son, simply was not doing enough.

He saw the effect cyber-bullying had on his kid. He was well aware of the consequences, sometimes tragic, that can result from such cruelty, especially when it goes viral. And when the school said it had done all it could, he declared that’s simply not enough.

“I’m bringing all my fighting power to this battle,” he said.

And he did.

So much so that Naperville Detective Rich Wistocki, well-known for his work on cyber crimes big and small, told me this father’s unrelenting pressure has “brought attention to a matter that “we all need to look at in a different light.”

By “we,” Wistocki not only means schools, but law enforcement, legislatures and, most importantly, parents, “who don’t have a clue” their kids are victims of cyber-bullying or have become the culprits themselves.

Certainly cyber-bullying has been in plenty of headlines lately. Since last April, schools have been mandated by Springfield to have a policy in place regarding the issue; and by this coming school year, all Illinois school districts must also have training programs for students on cyber-bullying and other Internet safety.

There’s no doubt schools are stepping up efforts. In February, for example, Oswego school and law enforcement officials spoke to a large group of parents and students.

“During my last three years here at the school, I went from virtually no knowledge of cyber bullying to having to become very informed,” Jason Bastin, student resource officer at Oswego East High School, told the audience of more than 200.

But educational programs alone are not enough to break the toxic culture that has become so rampant. Wistocki says schools must constantly redefine and strengthen their policies, even as Springfield plays catch-up to the ever-changing technology and opportunities it provides for malicious behavior.

Last year, state Rep. Darlene Senger of Naperville, whose district includes Aurora’s far East Side, introduced two more bills, both written by Wistocki, that address cyber abuses. House Bill 2053 outlines new criminal penalties, a class 4 felony for first offenses, for anyone who tampers with another’s computer; or hijacks another’s online profile and sends out false data.

After passage of HB-2053 out of the House on Wednesday, Senger says she’s making the second bill a “top priority.” HB-2052, co-sponsored by Rep. Kay Hatcher of Yorkville, would broaden and define criminal penalties for those using electronic means to threaten or intimidate.

While Peter claims his “10 days of hell” since learning of his son being cyber-bullied included pressuring lawmakers to fast track these bills, Senger says it was just a coincidence the two are now moving forward.

Likewise, the dad is convinced his persistence forced the school district to step up efforts to strengthen its own policy. This week the Naperville district outlined new guidelines that include more disciplinary action for cyber-bullying, more comprehensive training and more education for parents.

Director of Communications Susan Rice, however, says “we have been working on this for a long time” and these changes had already been included in the final version of the student discipline policies that will go before the school board April 18.

Whether or not this dad’s doggedness made a difference, says Wistocki, it’s that kind of parental involvement that can lead to positive change.

It’s all about keeping children safe. And the detective points to Bonnie Waltmire’s daughter, Hilary, a St. Charles North junior who committed suicide in 2007, as an example of how serious the issue can become. Wistocki says it was later discovered a group of girls used her boyfriend’s phone to send a text to her that he wanted to break up. After Waltmire examined her daughter’s MySpace page and other sites, she found other examples of bullying and harassment.

While schools can certainly do more to address cyber-bullying, it’s this tragic Kane County case, says Wistocki, that reminds him of why the homefront remains his biggest concern.

“I hear it all the time ... ‘My kid would never do it,’” he said. “There lies the essence of the problem.”